Summer, 2013 “Every morning I jump out of bed and step on a landmine. The landmine is me. After the explosion, I spend the rest of the day putting the pieces together.”
Late Summer, 2013 |
“You know, bicycling isn't just a matter of balance," I said. "it's a matter of faith. You can keep upright only by moving forward. You have to have your eyes on the goal, not the ground. I'm going to call that the Bicyclist's Philosophy of Life.”― Susan Vreeland
Last weekend, I was still not feeling strong enough to resume my marathon training, and was also not up for the social visits we scheduled during the week.
This is why I stayed at home with oldest daughter (who needs to catch up on finishing school work!) while Mijn Liefste P and the girls went off without us to welcome a new member of the family - more on this, next time,
I went under the duvet after preparing snacks, set up the DVD to watch The Hobbit 1 & 2, and mentally let go of my need to do everything.
"Everything", I feel I should be doing to feel deserving of the good life I feel will be taken away from me, if I don't make myself worthy…
Deep, huh? :)
Digging deep within the recesses of my consciousness is what I have been doing since I started with blogging - first anonymously 9 years ago, and publicly since 4 years - and I think this year before Spring has sprung, I finally struck "gold".
Nope, this blog is not getting a huge sponsorship*! :D
No. What I gained from blogging, what I considered as "gold", my positive precious are: life balance and quiet contentment.
I've learned after years of what I call as "My Ground Hog Days", what gives me peace of mind is having acquired the ability to embrace my life with the best, as well as the worst, the moments of serenity with the daily threat of chaos.
In doing what I can (and enjoying what I can!) until I can do better - I easily breathe in life's daily blessing, and exhale out the distractions, which in the end, in the big scope of things , do not truly matter.
The daily biking, running everywhere (!!!) and taking thousands of photos to document everything - they all contributed to helping me see life with clarity, and living the lessons learned in the process.
February, 2015 |
Winter, 2015 |
The energy I gained from the pursuit of living & documenting a life outdoors, helped me blog again @ Happy Feet in the Netherlands & The Lightness of Being on the Bike with more enthusiasm.
I feel more liberated, open and natural in my writing because I feel good in my skin, and in turn I find it rewarding in seeing, how it is reflecting in my blogging.
“Writing is the only way I have to explain my own life to myself.”
November, 2014 |
I added a quote to the Google+ enhanced image - it was a picture (see above this picture) I took while running in the woods of Hilversum |
My family and I have now seen many seasons here in Holland, and we feel truly at home.
A collage of 2008 and 2011 pictures |
A collage of 2009 pictures |
January, 2011 |
2011 |
January 2015 |
31st of December, 2014 |
We went through a lot, and we gained strength. We weathered through the seasons, and flourished. We accepted the changes, and gained wisdom.
Sunrise, one February morning - seen from the backyard of our cul de sac |
February, 2015 Simple life, simple morning waiting for their ride to school |
From here on, I (together with my family!) will embrace the positive possibilities of the present & future with open arms* and lighter being!
___________________________________________________________
*This was never ever my purpose when I began with blogging. Although I did attempt to give it a try 2 years ago out of curiosity. I recognize the same conflicts of emotion I did, when I was working in advertising and media. I seem to alway lose my motivation to write after a while.
No comments:
Post a Comment